We’ve been on our annual summer vacation for about 5 1/2 weeks, and I finally feel like I have a bit of head space to sit down and write a bit of an update.
I actually sat down a while back, maybe two months ago (or more?!?) and started writing a big ol’ homeschool update. It quickly grew into a book, so I knew it needed to be a multi-part series, which then got put on the back burner for all the things of life. I want to put that up here at some point, because I know a lot of you have questions about how that’s been going for us and what we’ve been doing etc. I can share nutshell versions with you right now :)
All in all, we love homeschooling. Yes, my kids complain about having to do school, but they complained about having to go to school, so I don’t really consider that a thing. It’s part of being a kid. We like doing school at home where we can be more relaxed, life can happen around us, and I feel like the kids are getting the hang of it and enjoying the process. We definitely had a lot of rough days as we worked through adjustments to schedule, structure, discipline, and the type of work we’re doing. But, I expected that. Many days Chris would come in the kitchen where we work and later tell me that he had no idea where my patience came from.
I really feel like it’s a gift God has and is giving me, because one of my top reasons for not homeschooling in the past was that I thought I just wouldn’t have the patience for it. I think deep down, I’m learning more about our kids, seeing what they need, and how to get there. It’s a combination of wanting to do what is best for them and accepting the challenge of getting there. Some days I was reduced to tears, but again, I anticipated that as we transitioned. It’s a lot to go from years of being in a school “system” and then come home and do things completely differently. A lot of people recommend “de-schooling” your kids when you transition to homeschooling, and while we didn’t have the space/time to do that without it becoming a struggle (Chris and I work from home), I understand the need.
Knowing we would need transition time, I really looked at our time from March to June, when we would leave for our vacation, as our transition time. That was the time where we could play around with everything and see what worked for us, what didn’t, what we liked, what we didn’t, and I could decide what directions I/we wanted to go in after we got back in August. I had time to look at curriculum, make lists of supplies I wanted/needed, etc. I’m thankful that I took that approach because it gave me the time to ease into things in a way, even though we really jumped in with both feet.
What’s funny for me is that I look at the things that I thought I was sure about when we started, and what has changed since then. For example, I was sure that, even though we were using the kitchen for school, it would not end up looking like a classroom. We already had a chalkboard on the wall, and I wanted something to hang a map on, that I could turn around. I made that, and then saw that everyone was constantly checking out the map and how much it became a part of our every day, and didn’t ever turn it around. I started to see how much school and the space became part of our everyday, and I realized I really liked that. We really liked it. And I embraced making our home our learning space, and figuring out how to use what we have to make it more so.
I’ve also seen changes in what the schedule I thought we were going to keep was, versus what we were doing before we left. Initially, because we start our days so early (alarm goes off at 4:30 am) we were starting school at 7 am after I’d done about an hour of office work. Over time I realized my kids just weren’t quite there yet, so I gently pushed to an 8 am start time, and we still finish at 12, but have gotten more done. This gives me time to get up, make breakfast for Chris and I, and the kids if they’re up, start the work day and do about an hour and a half of work, take about 30 minutes of getting school stuff set up and quiet time for me, then jump into school for about 4 hours, eat lunch, then a couple more hours of work. I like the rhythm we landed in before we left because it works for the kids and it works for me, playing to our normal rhythms. It will most likely shift and change as we go, but I like the framework.
Having flexibility is amazing, and not having to plan our days around school is amazing. We didn’t realize how much of our mission planning had come to revolve around school drop off and pick up. It was always there and someone always had to be available to do it. It meant that one of us had to be around. Now, we have flexibility. We have the option of not doing school on a day or week if we have other stuff going on, or if we want to go do other things. We can leave the kids with Yonese, our housekeeper/Haiti grandma/woman who helps us keep our sanity, and know the kids will be well taken care of while Chris and I go do things. It’s SO freeing! We also don’t have to plan our vacation times around school schedules anymore if we don’t want to.
We read some fabulous books during our read aloud time each morning, and this has probably become our favorite time of our homeschooling day. It’s reminded me that so much can be learned through good books, and it gives me a chance to either share some of my/our favorites from childhood, or explore things I didn’t get to read when I was younger.
Curriculum wise, we did make some changes along the way after I saw that some things just weren’t working for us, and that’s okay. I’ve been learning more about the kids and what works for them, what is hard, and am learning the difference between the “must do’s” and the “can we do it another way or later on” things. Again, the beauty of homeschooling is having that option and not forcing your kids to move on to something, or do something in a way that is frustrating or that they just aren’t ready for yet.
I think the biggest learning curve has been with me personally. I’d read in many places that homeschooling parents say they probably learn more than their kids, and man, that is SO true. Not only do you have to figure out how to make it all work, what curriculum and resources to use/follow, you have to go back and re-learn all those things that you’ve either forgotten about, or are just second nature. And the things that you know, but struggle to know how to teach. Watching your kids glaze over as you try to explain long division or reducing fractions, and realizing it’s because you need to try explaining it more clearly or in a different way that makes sense, is HARD. But, I love the challenge, and the kids often tease me because I’m more excited about something than they are. My hope is that enthusiasm will show them that learning is a life long thing that we can look forward to, and that they’ll grow up with a desire and curiosity to explore everything this world has to offer.
Other non-homeschooling life things…
Well, this one is still related, but is more general life in nature, so I’ll share it here. I would love some prayer for myself specifically in this area, as well as our family. When we get back there will be some changes, which may mean more of a work load for me for a while. My prayer is just being able to balance work and school and family. In January, knowing we were going to be homeschooling, I officially went down to part-time with CWH, which has been good for me because it gave me personally some boundaries to work within, rather than feeling like I was pulled in all directions. That’s been a good shift, but we’re still in the process of figuring out how to get all the things done that need to be done so I’m not overworked. I know we’ll get there, it’s just something that takes time and needs to be worked out.
Our vacation has been great. We still have a week to go, and honestly, it’s been the best break I’ve had in over a year, which was much needed. I normally take a week in the spring to head to the Dominican Republic with my friend Naomi, but she was away for a month during the time we normally go, and with just getting started with school, it wasn’t a good time. That meant a looooooonnng stretch between Christmas and summer vacation for me, and I won’t lie, it was a hard push at the end. Chris and I are both learning that as we get older, and as the kids get older and the responsibility of running Clean Water for Haiti grows, we both need those times away each year. Typically we each do some fund raising annually, and each take a vacation trip on our own without the rest of the family, along with our summer family vacation, and those breaks really help us to be better people, parents, spouses, and leaders. We know that’s something we need to prioritize, along with little breaks here and there as a couple. See, this learning thing never ends!
This summer we flew into Portland on June 17, which had it’s own adventures, and spent two days with Chris parents, then hopped in the van and headed up to BC to see my family for 2 1/2 weeks. While in BC we went camping for a week with my parents and my brother and his family joined us for the Canada Day long weekend. We had a family fishing derby, which was really fun. Yours Truly took the adult prize after landing a 15 Kokanee salmon at the last minute when we were supposed to be heading for the docks. My brother was a champ in his congratulations and giving up his lead :)
After we got back down to Vancouver, WA, where Chris’ parents live, he and I headed off to the Long Beach Peninsula for a week at a friend’s cottage. They’re so gracious to let us use it when we come, and it’s truly a place of rest for us. We spent the first few nights on our own, which we realized was the first time in a year where no one needed us, and there were no expectations on our time. It was great. Chris’ parents and sister then joined us with the kids for a couple days, then left the kids with us when they returned home. We spent a couple more days there, then set out camping up the Washington coast, something none of us had done before. It rained half of the time, which was pretty miserable, but we made due and still tried to enjoy ourselves.
Since we’ve been back in Vancouver we’ve just been doing whatever comes up each day. Today Chris is off hiking Mount Hood with some friends, and I’m getting my birthday pedicure. For the first time ever, in the history of life as a Rolling family, Chris and I have most of our stuff packed to head back to Haiti. It was kind of a necessity after we arrived back in the US to this…
Most of what we’re taking back is stuff for school, whether it’s books, school supplies, or things to help organize all of it. It’s SO MUCH, but not having a library available means creating our own, and not easily being able to get some of the supplies we need means a lot of planning ahead. I literally had to go through our whole year of school resources, make lists of what we needed/wanted, and then shop for everything that I knew we would need from now until December (we’re coming back for Christmas this year). Some things can wait until then, but I also don’t know how quickly we’ll move through things like science, so I need to plan as much as I can. Buying things like containers for workboxes and storage and organization are a one time thing, so it feels and really is so much right now, but again, it’s one time. Next time we won’t have to get those things and it’ll be more curriculum/resources and supplies and books.
Yeah, books… lol! SO. MANY. BOOKS. We use Kindles for a lot of reading, but we also like books for things like bedtime reading. Both kids still like picture books along with their chapter books, and I think it’s really important to have the tactile experience of flipping pages. I’ve been trying to purchase books that will be things we use for many years, with a lot of bang for your buck. Things like Usborne books which are fabulous and so well done with internet links to go beyond the info in the book. Again, it feels like so much right now, but I feel like once we get a good base, we’ll buy more specific stuff over the years and do more digital. For now though, I want things I can pull from to supplement all of our subjects. I would love to say that I’m kidding, but I’m not – we’re taking back over 100 lbs of books! Life of expats! :)
Speaking of digital vs. non-digital, we made a decision the other day to not only save our sanity, but also because we realized it really was the best thing for our kids/family. We got the kids Kindle Fires for Christmas two years ago, and over time the game apps have started making us crazy. The constant harassment over adding games, how much time to play etc was just too much. Olivia got a computer for Christmas that same year, and Alex just got one for his birthday this month. Again, the screens. A few days ago we took all screens away from the kids and told them they’ll get their tablets back when we get on the plane. We noticed they were getting more and more disrespectful, didn’t want to do anything, and were just all around cranky. That’s not what we believe technology should be about. In the past few days it’s like being with different kids.
Going forward, we’re going to be making big changes at home with how we allow screen time, along with chores, etc. For school I had developed a green light/red light system where the kids would get an hour of screen time if they ended the day with a green light. Olivia didn’t really care too much, but for Alex it was the only thing that drove him to do anything, which is not what I want for school. We’re going to be shifting to a token system that we can use for all kinds of things at home, whether it’s school or chores, or just seeing good character and things like that. The kids will be able to earn tokens for doing chores, etc, and will get tokens for showing good effort in school and other things. They’ll also have tokens taken away for the opposite. They can then trade those tokens in for screen time on the weekends. Along with hopefully eliminating some of the crazy, I’m hoping it will help them grasp the concept of earning rewards, and enforce delayed gratification. Using a token system, where they have a jar and physical tokens, is kind of like money. When they exchange tokens for things they want, we’re hoping it’ll reinforce the concept of working and earning money to then exchange for goods and services to do life with. That there is value and planning involved. I still need to work out the details, but I think this is the direction we’re headed in. For Chris and I, having a printed page on the fridge for set token things will also help us be more consistent as parents, too.
Whew, that was a BIG dump of all the things! I do miss being in this space, and am hoping that I’ll be able to get here more as I work on taking care of myself and doing things that bring me joy and fulfillment aside from home and work stuff. I’m also trying to be gentle with myself and remember that life has seasons, and this one is a busy one for us.
As I was going through pictures to put in this post I realized I really need to do a separate vacation picture post, because we’ve done a lot! Look for that next!
~Leslie
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